He lied

😭😭😭😭

He lied
All that time I could lie on his chest as he whispered sweet words to me and I would giggle a little so foolishly happy,he lied.

He lied
All that time he would give a five minute hug telling how he missed me ,that two days turned five when he didn't see me,he lied.

He lied
When he said he understood me that it's unfair not getting back the love you give and it being taken advantage of by some,he lied.

He lied
When he wanted my kiss telling me he wasn't in love with her girlfriend anymore and that it had been a month since they spoke,he lied.

He lied
When he told me he loved me, that I'm a unique person,that I told him my secrets,I trusted him with my lips then I loved him back,he lied.

Midnight sleep

She has to lie for her to get time to study, perhaps even a hour to meditate about all that's been moving fast or, even time to get enough sleep or, even some moment to learn that not all time is ment for some fucking friend you not gonna date, even if that has been his intention since day one.

But it's strikes her like the pain of losing everything, like that moment I woke up discovering that the death of my mum was going to be worse pain than that of dad and kept me weeping the rest of the morning and so in pain I remain torn in way open.

 Yet now the feeling of being with him is stronger than before and today it kills your weekend for not being beside him and I have to know that we not dating just besties and I should empty my heart out to get the glimpse of being loved back.

Though am emotionally trapped with my atrocity, my head keeps calling me a moron, freak, failure, pig bitch, a disappointment and I need to voice up my might but I've forgotten my language,I've got to wake the life of my eyes lest I remain blinded in filtration.

I've got to define my personality for not you seeing me as the timid, short, dark, dready girl, For I get along with my loneliness perfectly and I have to free my heart for being without pain is like losing my demeanour for the worst, I know is there's no power to live,it's not worthy after all.

Dead stars

Perhaps I was in good mood,a cheerful time, around a dexterous throng,having a crowd of elated thoughts or that bad shape of having a cough and can't last a minute without sternutation,yet you'll have to chuckle so it seems funny in a way but, I was in this point mid dispute ,a recovery discovery when I had a crush.

Should you know_he stared at me for awhile but I faded before lasting that ecstatic gaze,if am to describe him his picture won't stick, for you need to know his colour, his bracelet, his shape ,his smile and those cloudy eyes that'll bury me in sand would they see me again for I can't tell his height,his name,his scent or his voice.

I'm hopeful he doesn't mind my ill language and is someone you feel worth of mending your worn off heart and still I feel like meeting him and have unending talks about this and that but I sleep feeling okay and mindless of self imaging, he's obviously not the right one, he'll obviously die before me.