Grapes

Someone hugged me,he tried lifting me up but I declined,he wanted hold me long but I refused,he wanted to kiss my neck but I shrugged off,he insisted on holding me long but I fought my way out,he tried moving his hands over me but I stumped my feet,he whispered that it's alright,but I yelled back no.

Since,it wasn't that warm like yours,his scent wasn't peaceful like yours,his arms didn't grab me like yours,his smell wasn't yours,his height wasn't close to yours,his voice wasn't deep like yours,his breath wasn't cool like yours,he was not you.

It was just a small while,yet I didn't want it to last,I just wanted to break free,it wasn't you,it is never you,it's not like how I always jump on you,it's not like how I always smile back when you brush yourself over me,its not like how I never want your touch to end,it's not like how I love listening to your voice,it's not like......when he left I noted I've never needed someone this bad,yet still I wonder is it so sad, having a horny short girlfriend?

love

To some it's a game,like they state dating was for fun like playing chess only that when the king is checkmated you no longer in love,my friends say it's a process that should begin with friendship then dating then being in love or being in love coming before dating and others say it just happens love comes in when you feel it's time up for loneliness.

Yet to me it starts with a procedure,like a crush first then a friend to close best friends who have movie nights turning to sleepovers and we start kissing eachother and slowly as I  lie on his body his arms brushing over, I let my left ear listen to heartbeat whose rhythm doesn't change and I lie to myself that he doesn't lie and wish to freeze the moment to be us,for I've been hiding the love.

But in darkness I build scenes under my thoughts for my body is overloaded with lust,I'm after his body I think,  while expecting love to be an unending feeling ,it is a tale with an end at the start and sooner I'll like to break free,disengage from this bond unbounded and it's black valentine's as it's always been.